When was the last time you called someone you dating or seeing? Just because you wanted to hear their voice. Not because you needed something. But just because you wanted a little gnomon with them. We all have these ways to communicate, but somehow a lot of our conversations have become updates. And listen, somebody does need to know what time you're getting home or they need updates, you know. In regards to what's happening, but whatever happened to you flirting. Welcome back to Spicy Spectrum. It's your dream girl pepper. And today we're talking about how to make a phone call feel more spicy again. How to bring a little anticipation into your relationship without feeling like you have to audition for a role you didn't apply for. Through my work in the adult industry, I'm spent years speaking to thousands of men as a phone sex operator. Something that stands out is how much the experience can depend on the way a conversation may fill through the attention, the playfulness. Feeling like the person on the other end actually wants to be there. And there are things that we can take that we may learn from even phone sex back into our relationships. Something that I've noticed when it comes to my clients is that a common pattern is that not only do they enjoy the sexual satisfaction, but they also just enjoy the conversation. Telling a story from the past relating to their childhood, or telling me a spicy story that happened the night before, or even telling me something that's going to happen, and then wanting to fantasize about what is about to happen and trying to tap into a story that could happen. Those are the kind of things I hear. Them, you know, trying to escape from their world and tap into a world where they can be naughty selves in private. First, why does a voice feel a different? A text lets you read the words. A phone call, however, lets you hear what's happening around them. You can actually hear someone smiling through a phone. You can hear someone hesitate. You can hear that little change when they stop being distracted and start paying attention. Even something as simple as hey, you and can feel different, right? And you know, that's the part that interests me about phone conversations is that there's room for personality. And you don't have to look a particular way, you don't have to worry about the camera, you don't have to worry about a certain angle if your bedroom is clean. You get to listen and respond. And when someone calls a professional line, there can be different reasons as well that are different than phone sex. You may need to get your phone fixed, or you may need to speak to your boss. On phone sex line, there is a particular voice, there's a fantasy, there's a structure of the interaction or time set aside for that particular person. I can speak on what I've encountered. I can't tell you what every man is thinking. And I also can't tell you how a purchase alone can tell you something or reveal something. But one thing worth paying attention to is this is that people can value how you feel during a conversation. So that gives us a useful question for our relationships, which is when we talk, do we ever get to enjoy each other or are are we always trying to get something handled? Calls can feel rush, and that can be heard over the phone. You may not have the time. Someone can tell when the focus is not on them. I know, for example, when I first started phone sex, when I first started, there were times where I may have had some noise in the background, or I forgot someone was delivering a package and it interrupted the call, or my window was open, or whatever the case may be, I've had to learn to make sure that the environment is calm, relaxing, and there are no distractions, and the person doesn't feel rush. Even when I first started to, I would want to rush phone calls or talk really fast or whatever the case may be, they wouldn't know. And so that's what I've had to learn is to make sure my undivided attention is on the person on the other line. Another thing is that you don't need a special voice. Let me take some of the pressure off right now. You don't need to invent a voice. I know I have a soft, seductive voice. It's one of the biggest compliments I get with my phone sex from my clients, is my voice. You can have any kind of voice. You don't need to pick up the phone. Pretending like you're narrating a perfume commercial or change your voice is into some funny character. You can sound like yourself. You can sound funny, direct, you can be shy at first. All you need is what you've already given, been given to work with. And, you know, give the call a little room. So before you start a phone sex call, find out whether the other person is even in the space for a spicy conversation. I have had times where a client called me and then they had to hang up really quickly because they have to do something. Or they may be in a rush. Or again, like I said, I may have had background noise. Yeah, you have to make sure that you know each person on the line is available. Even if that involves planning something, if you're not the spontaneous type that can just call late at night or early in the morning to have that naughty spicy call, you may need to schedule it or say, Hey, why don't we talk tonight? Or hey, why don't we schedule a call this weekend? I know even for me, I've scheduled calls with my clients where they they'll say, Hey, are you available in three hours? All right, cool. And then we'll and then we'll plan something. And then that builds up excitement, that builds up anticipation. And then when it's finally time for my client's call, they'll say things like, Hey, I was really looking forward to talking to you. I I got excited. I've been waiting all these hours and tell you my dirty fantasy, I couldn't wait. So that's fun too. You don't have to dread a call that's coming. You can get excited, you can, you know, prepare. And there are certain ways, other ways that I like to prepare. If you like to learn the other tips that I don't share on here, I do offer Pepper's perspectives. You can visit spicyspectrumpcast.com. The link is to the left-hand side under the description section. Book a call with me, a time to speak, and I can tell you personal ways that I prepare for phone sex calls that help me tap into my naughty mood. But certain simple ways, the service level ways, not the ones, not the not the ones that I dive deep with my clients, but simple ways you can you can, you know, start off a call is if you don't know what to say, start it simple. You don't always have to jump into sex. In fact, during my calls, I don't always jump into sex. Simple. How are you? How are you feeling? You know, what did you do? What did you do today? Basic conversations that you'll have with anyone else when it comes to getting it warmed up. Then you go into you then you want to dive deeper when you know things start slowing down, there's a pause. You may want to talk about something that you enjoyed last time you all were together. Um a memory, something that triggered the phone call in the first place, the kind of mood that you're feeling. Don't be afraid. You can tap into your own alter ego too. If you don't want to be yourself and or you're too scared, or there's something where you're shy, you can create a character. You can act, you can take, you don't have to be that person. You can be a whole different character, and that'll help you bring out the naughty version of yourself, the more relaxed version of yourself that you want to that you want to be over the phone. I always tap into an alter ego with me. I tap into a role play or character that I want to be with my client, and that usually helps me get more comfortable. Another thing is to let the other person respond. In this case, you may be a wife or girlfriend listening, and you may want to hear, you know, him respond. Be okay with pauses, even if he doesn't respond. There are so many cases on the phone when I'm on the phone with clients where there's an awkward, it's it's it may feel awkward, but it's not. You're letting things breathe, you're letting things pause naturally. But even if you speak, once you say something, give him a second. You don't have to fill in every pause because you're nervous or you're trying to fill in the gap. He might be surprised. You might, or he may be figuring out whether you know you're serious about what you're talking about, you know. He may be trying to think of something good to say back. Just let it flow. You can ask a small question, you can smile through the phone, you can pause, you can listen. You know, for a you know, a playful call may become a lot easier when you don't feel like you have a responsibility of carrying the whole experience. Think of it as a normal conversation, but with a little bit more spice to it. For the person receiving the call on the other end, meet someone where they are. If you're enjoying the call, let them know. Say, I really like how you say that. I really like that you said that. Or how did you know? If there's something that they said that was on your mind, say, I was just thinking about that. Literally say how you're feeling, what's happening, what you're doing. You because the other person can't see you, whether it's the person receiving or doing, whatever the case may be, audio with audio, you you have to use your words, you have to use your imagination. So that's what I do during my phone calls that have helped me with my naughty calls. And I know you may be asking, well, Pepper, what if it feels awkward? It probably will feel awkward the first few times, especially if it's new. That doesn't mean that there isn't chemistry though. It means you're trying something you don't usually do and you're still getting the hang of it. I still get nervous for certain phone calls versus calls I don't get nervous about, depending on the niche or fetish or whatever the case may be. For the most part, I don't get nervous because I've been practicing every single day. You can start small, you can s you can start off with a two-minute call. You don't have to go in there talk talking to the other person for 30 minutes doing phone sex. You can, you know, acknowledge what's happening. You can even say, look, I don't usually talk like this, but you know, I want to try something new. That sentence gives the other person a chance to understand what you're reaching out for. I know, for example, when my clients reach out and they're new, they may say something like that, like, this is my first time doing this kind of call with you, you know, on this website. I've never done phone sex before. I don't usually do this kind of stuff. So that's that signals to me, okay, they may not know what to do on the call. They may not know how to lead. I'm gonna take the lead a little. Or, you know, I'm gonna be more patient with this person for this particular aspect of the call because they don't know how this goes. When I first started, I would catch myself too, where I've had a new caller. You know, I used to get frustrated and say, hey, like, why are you calling? I mean, you don't know what kinker fetish that you want to do. Well, this person may not know what to do, they don't know what you know what they're into. And so I've even had to check myself or be more self-aware that you know someone may not know what to do, and that requires just more patience. So um giving the person, you know, space to give their answers and um even asking them questions to confirm if they like something. Do you like when I say that? Are you okay if I say that? Always establish clear boundaries from the beginning. And um, yeah, if you say something that feels kind of funny and the person mocks you or dismisses you, then that's a conversation that deserves a separate conversation. You want to make sure that whoever you're talking to, you feel comfortable and you don't feel like you're being judged or feel like you know they're mocking you. Finding a better opening um helps to again practicing different ways of saying certain things or how you want to start a conversation. And what you can take from my work. When I talk about what I've learned in this industry, I want to be clear about something. A professional session has a agreed purpose. So time, boundaries, like like I said earlier, a relationship has a much bigger life around it. And so I understand that there are bills and there's stress and there's responsibilities. So I'm not suggesting that you compare yourself to someone providing a service like me or feel responsible for recreating that experience. So you're not a professional, it's still fun. You can appreciate being noticed, you can appreciate being with the one that you're attracted to and have a spicy conversation and you know, feel f still feel comfortable. So it's still something that you can look forward to hearing that familiar voice while your partner is out of town, um, having that same playfulness that you would have in person, but virtually. And so you can also get to think about what you enjoy, what turns you on, what makes you feel comfortable, and what kind of attention you would like to receive back from the other person. You are a part of the conversation too. So I always make sure that, you know, we're on the same page. I may incorporate something I feel comfortable saying or doing over the phone. I may ask them what they feel comfortable doing or saying over the phone, and I may remember certain details, I write certain things down that they may say, just little things that they know that I remember about them and they appreciate that too. That I remember what they like, I remember what they don't like, little things like that. And so here's something that is sweet. If you both enjoy phone calls, find five minutes where you can have a little privacy. You can start with a sentence that means a lot to you, something that's real, something that's genuine. Genuine, right? I wanted to hear your voice. I'm so glad we, you know, got to be on the phone together. Then mention something that you've noticed. Bring up a memory, bring up something that's happened in the past. You can suggest something you're looking forward to together and see where the conversation goes. And you don't have to make it too long. You can still end up in a situation or a call where you're both enjoying it and you want to get back to what you were doing, or just kind of test out the waters. So there's something great about you know, getting a call from someone you already know and who already knows you, and realize that you still want to flirt with them and still spice things up. And if you're listening and thinking, I would love that, or I don't know where to start, or I need more details. Again, I offer pepper's perspective. There are certain rituals I do. Um, I don't have five stars for nothing. I on my phone sex lines. Um, I'm one of the top phone sex operators. I have have wonderful reviews. I can teach you some of the things that I've learned from me, what's worked for me, how I get myself warmed up, how I tap into certain aspects, you know, of my character or personality, and how I keep having guys come back for more because they do. I have clients who come back to me every single day, every single week. And there's a reason for it. And if you want to learn more, check me out. Visit spicyspectrumpcast.com. On the far right, you'll find the link to connect with me for a one-on-one. Um, I know sometimes people don't feel comfortable asking me questions on Spicy Spectrum Live. There are certain things I can't even talk about, or else I'll get flagged. So if you want a more private conversation, conversation where you can hide your identity or just want a more private one-on-one time with me, you can do that. It can be phone sex, it can be about a text you got, it can be about a scenario coming up, it can be about you questioning a kinker fetish that somebody brought to you and you don't know what to do, reach out to me, I'll give you my perspective. Again, I've been doing these for for years. I've spoken to thousands of men, and I may have an answer that you're looking for or a perspective that you have not thought about. So check me out. Stay tuned for more. If I don't see you on Spicy Spectrum Live on Monday, I'll see you next Wednesday. If you missed this past subsect for my What He's Thinking series, I do dive into this topic with a different angle. That link is also in the show notes. All the links to connect with me are in the show notes, social media as well. Thank you for joining and stay tuned for the next episode right here on Spicy Spectrum.